One year ago today......

Well it's been exactly one year since I had the dreaded mammogram that showed I had breast cancer. I can't believe it's been an entire year already!


Anywho...... here's an update on my hair growth, almost 6 months out of chemofriggintherapy. I'm totally loving short hair in this hot humid Jersey weather!



Been on Tamoxifen for almost 3 months now, besides hot flashes and mood swings:o) , no crazy side effects , yet!

All clear and no more wig!!!

Saw my wonderful doctor this morning for a routine check-up. I am all cleared and don't have to see him for another 3 months!!!
Now up until today I have only been wearing my wig to work. So I thought what better way to celebrate this day then to just do it!
So for the first time in 10 months... yes 10 months!! I am officially wig free, even at the office!
I've been taking Tamoxifen for a month now with no noticeable side effects (knock on wood). Sometime in the fall I will have my 2nd phase of reconstruction done. I get my new girls! Yes, the Foobs are going to graduate to Girls!
Well this will be my last post for a while. I'll update on my hair growth every now and then, and of course when the time comes for my new girls to arrive, I'll update on that too!

Peace out.

Thought of the ......... Year

Hair Update 14 weeks

It's getting very... fluffly?????????????

FINALLY, BACK TO A NORMAL LIFE

3 MONTHS POST CHEMOFRIGGINTHERAPY

Had a visit with my chemogod today. Everything is all good. I don't see him for another month! wow... I'm going to miss him, and his nurses. He told me that funny enough when one gets to this stage, you feel kind of abandoned and lost, sort of like no one is looking after you. He is right. BUT... I am also going to start living my life like it used to be... and that's a good thing!

I trimmed MY hair and put some color in MY hair today! It didn't take much, as I was told, I should probably wait around 6 months. I definitely needed a trim because it was kinda crazy.. top was longer then the back, it was covering my ears... and it just needed a "neating up".

Got my prescription of Tamoxifen today ... my lifesaver. There are many side effects , OF COURSE. Some are mild, and some can be serious and rare. We'll see how I do. I see my plastic surgeon in a month to see what he thinks about exchanging my tissue expanders to the real thing! OMG I cannot wait to get these god forsaken horrid hard plastic things out of my chest. Oh..,. but they have given me some shape, so let me not complain:-)

Live long and prosper.

Me.

Hair update 12 weeks post chemo

Seeing lots more grey and the top is longer and wavy, then the back.... hence the cockatiel effect!

Wow......

Boy do I have a real good burn. Here's some updated pics cause the below posts where I posted my "sunburn" seems like nothing. These pics still do not really show the intense color of my skin. It's actually kinda scary to have purple skin! The radiation treatments are "accumulative", which means even though I am not having treatments anymore the effects of the radiation are still working (as you can see from the pics, these were taken today, which is 7 days since my last treatment.) I was told it should heal up in about a month from my last treatment. Can't be soon enough. I seem to have said that many times in the last year haven't I!?!?

On the bright side, I no longer have a doctor appointment or blood work every week. I tried to total up my appointments, etc. since the beginning of my diagnosis, and I stopped at 100... that's 100 actual visits to the doctor, or a test, etc. Thank god for insurance.

WOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I am done with radiation treatments!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm fried, but I am done!

My "sunburn"......

So far I have had 22 treatments, with just 3 left. This Friday the 22nd will be my last zapping, and it can't come soon enough. I have a pretty bad burn on 3/4 of my chest that runs from my collarbone down to below my ribs, under my arm and part of my back and there are spots of open skin under my arm, that I can only say is "uncomfortable", cause that is putting it nicely:-) There's really nothing that will "help" the burn go away, except time. Next week I am told will be the worst time, even though I won't be having any treatments. I use a pure aloe vera gel , and now I am using aquaphor under my arm on the raw spots.

Hair hair hair

I think it's safe to say it's growing?!?!?

In the single digits

9 more radiation treatments to go! So far no serious side effects, but I do get nauseas as the days go on. I'm getting a pretty good sunburn, but it recovers a little over the weekend.

My hair is really starting to sprout too. I decided that in 4 weeks, no matter what it looks like, I am going out in public without my top! (aka wig). We have a camping trip planned the first week of June, a bunch of family and friends and kids... so that will be my break in period:-) ! Think I'm going to dye it a funky color first, .... any ideas anyone???

Grow baby grow!

Well I think it's starting to grow faster now.

I'm almost 2 months out of chemo... GROW GROW GROW! Wohooooooo!

10 Tanning sessions down, 15 to go

So far the radiation treatments aren't that bad. I'm a little pink so far, but nothing major (knock on wood). Getting tired as the day goes on.........that's about it!

I got Deported!!!!!

Now you see it......... (the port is the round bump under the skin)

Now you don't!!!!!!! (what you are looking at is the scar where they ripped the port out!), yes they gave me some lidocane first.

Hot as........

As a very cute little Hungarian/Puerto Rican girl once said ... "it's hot as balls" outside! And with a wig on that cannot be true enough!

Was in the 90's this weekend and my ever-so energetic Isabelle would not let me sit down for a moment. So we spent several hours at the park both Saturday and Sunday. So I went out and bought a short wig, my LAST wig... mark my words, I will not buy another one!

Had radiation treatment #6 this morning. So far so good. By the end of last week I was pretty tired, so as the week goes on I guess that's what will happen until I get to the point of "exhaustion", which I'm told will be around week 3.

Getting my port out tomorrow morning! I have to be at the hospital at 7:45 WITH BELLS ON!!!!!!!!

More reason to smile!

Not even sure I posted about this from the start. I have a port(chemoport), that was surgically placed in my upper arm under the skin. It's very small and has a long catheter that reaches into an artery in my heart. This is used to administer the chemo drugs that I had gotten. Well... my chemogod told me this morning that I can get it removed!!!!!!!! This is a definite in my eyes that I am really done with chemo. He tells me he has every reason to believe that my body is "disease free", due to my recent clear scans and my bloodwork, tumor markers, etc. So I am getting deported on Tuesday the 29th! It will be a good day indeed!

I figured ya'll tired of seeing my face, so I posted someone else's smile:-)

I'M SMILING!

Well... I have to admit for the first time in a while I finally have something to smile about. Well besides my beautiful in-the-terrible 2's baby girl's antics every day....... ALL MY SCANS CAME BACK CLEAR! Not that I didn't think they would:-)... but getting those scans really do cause some anxiety, let me tell you! And I am almost feeling normal, I think the chemo crap is finally leaving my bod!

PHEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

Now... let's get these tanning sessions done so me and my 2 favorite people can go on a well deserved vacation !!!!!!

1 Down, 24 to go!

Had my first radiation treatment today. I am having 3 areas radiated. My neck (lymph nodes), my underarm (lymph nodes) and my chest/breast area. Each area takes under a minute to radiate so it's really no big deal. But the parking at the hospital sucks, and they had me wait a bit for my treatment time.

So here goes the hair update again... I hoep this time I can keep going with no more interruptions! This is 5 weeks out of chemo. My side burns are like 2" long... but I have bald spots on the top and back of my head. Aghs. This weekend was so nice and Saturday was close to 80 degrees and my head under the wig wasn't very happy! So please everyone do a hair growing dance for me!

Why didn't I do this sooner????

I'm bra-less today! at work! AND IT FEELS GREAT! freedom!!!! I'm never wearing a bra again... and guess what? I DON'T HAVE TO!!!!!!!!! cause my foobs are firm and perky and round, and look like... BOOBS. so there!

One more week to get Tan!

I just hope the 5 weeks go by without any problems.

My chemogod has me going for restaging, "to be on the safe side" cause my tumor markers shot up during my last chemo treatments, but now they are back to normal. (sigh of relief).

So this Thursday I have my last mapping before starting the real radiation treatments on the 20th, but in the midst of that I have ct scans and bone scan on Friday, then next Tuesday one hour after my 2nd radiation treatment, I am going for a pet scan... ugg.... I cannot say enough how much I hate scans! My last scans in September, I had a bit of a panic attack, so I am really not looking foward to them.

Trying to force myself out and exericse a bit every day. Yesterday I did a couple of miles in the morning before my Easter cooking frenzy, it did make me feel pretty good, expect it was freezing out... ISN'T IT SPRING?!?!?

We had a great Easter with the family and also celebrated Brian's birthday, he's finally in his last year being a 30 year old... will he ever be 40!?!?!? Isabelle had a blast with her cousins! How cute are they!?!? Joey is getting so big, he is already 6 months old. Mason went on Brian's quad... I think someone needs to get him one:-)

Well, I still can't say I feel "normal", but who knows when that day will ever come. Probably Monday when I start radiation;-)

Having hot flashes every night now, like clock work from 1am to 5am, so my sleep has been nil. I'm told that will subside, some day.

And yes... my daughter started eatting candy at 730AM ! and kept on going.........

Lingering Side Effects

The only thing I am still bothered by is my eyesight. The minute I start to read something or drive my eyes hurt!

Got out for some Easter egg hunting this weekend. Isabelle, Mason and Joey got to sit on the Easter Bunny's lap. Izzy is sooo into Easter this year... she decorated the Easter Bunny's tree outside in the front lawn. When he hops on by he'll fill all the eggs! She even slept with one of the eggs she took from the hunt yesterday, how darn cute is that?!?!

Radiation set-up UPDATE

March 30, 2009

Today I am going for my radiation simulation. They'll set me down on a table for an hour and the computer will do it's thing, and I'll get a few tattoo's to mark the spots that the beam has to hit. I'll have 3 areas radiated.... every day for 5 weeks, starting April 20th.

Finally getting somewhat out of my chemo fog and my sinus problem seems to be getting a little better. Now if I can only get some sleep at night I'll be almost "normal"!

March 31, 2009

Ok for you people who get large tattoo's... you're all nuts! I got about 10 tattoo's, but they are very tiny little dots... and they f*&^(*& hurt!!!!

The simulation was no big deal, except I had to lay on a rock hard table with my arms above my head for an entire hour without moving one bit. So I am all set up in the computer to get zapped. I have to go for a trial run, then I start my treatments on the 20th, every morning at 10:15am. Apparently radiation treatment is a busy business, they only had one time slot open for me. So I am on the "waiting list", and if a time opens up earlier then I'll change. So looks like it's half days of work for me for those 5 weeks... and ya know what... maybe that's not a bad thing now anyway.

Side Effects from Hell

I guess being done with chemo doesn't mean being done with the side effects. So with this I have only one thing to say....this shit just better be working.

Wed. Mar. 18, 2009

Another doozey of a last step. This last treatment knocked me on my ass and that's to put it mildly. After coming home from the park on Saturday (my last post) I was pretty much comatose , and it lasted till this morning. Yesterday I somehow thought I could come to work, and I did, just to come back home 90 minutes later. Talk about chemofog, chemobrain, whatever you want to call it. It was actually pretty scary. Anyway... today I feel somewhat among the living and I hope it's all uphill from here.
Brian has been doing everything in the house and with Isabelle for the last 7 days and I think he could use a break (and some beer!)

I have my radiation simulation scheduled for March 30th, and if I have my choice I should start my tanning sessions April 13th. Going to try and get away for a few days before then if we could.

Thank Heaven......

for little girls !

If it wasn't for this smiling face I'd probably be on the couch in a big slump, eating bon-bons all day. Managed to get out Saturday afternoon for some fun time at the park with Isabelle for a couple of hours. After that I was pretty much on my arse rest of the day. Just extremely exhausted. I have a feeling this last treatment is going to take me a good 2-3 weeks to get over... but that's ok CAUSE I AM DONE!

LAST CHEMO FRIGGIN THERAPY!

That's right folks... done with chemo FOREVER! Just got back home about an hour ago and I'm ready to celebrate!!!!!!!!!! (shirley temple anyone?!) And yes, my shirt does say what you think it does and yes I did wear it to my last treatment!

Thought of the Day

ONE MORE TO GO

One last poison ..... scheduled for Friday, March 13th... yes Friday the 13th. But I'm putting aside my superstition cause it's going to be a good day!

I'm getting tired. Very tired. Falling asleep sitting up. Headaches abound and a sinus infection that just won't quit. I'm ready for a vacation, many of them. Far far away from my doctor's office and the infusion room!

Wound up getting wig #4. My long one is nearing the end of it's life... need to get it serviced and possibly cut cause I was so aggravated with it I took some hot rollers to it and "sort of" ruined the ends:-)

Home from #3 Tax, total treatments so far 7 and a new Foob update!

7 DOWN AND 1 TO GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Doc is saying I'm going to get knocked down hard with my alst 2 treatments. Oh joy oh bliss. Wanna come and have a pity party with me ya'll??? Oh just kidding. Im feeling better these days on the emotional side anyway. Tuesday I had my first cry fest. OIE.

I especially feel good and my foobs. I think I might be filled to capacity, or at least very close to it. My last fill on Tuesday actually is causing me a little bit of pain, just alot of stretchy and feeling very... FULL! One things I just realized is that in the summer I can wear little sexy strapless backless numbers, WITHOUT A BRA! and not worry about saggy boobs and jigglying all over the place.

Ah yes... summer shoppin is goin be fun!!!!!!!

February 23, 2009

Thursday will be my 7th chemo treatment. After this I will have one more then I will be done! Wohooooo! Then in April it's off to 6 weeks of radiation treatment. A whole new journey in itself. Can't wait:-)

Took Isabelle for a potty reward this weekend. Went to Build a Bear workshop Friday nite, then Saturday we surprised her with a pony ride. Oh you should have seen the smirk on that girls face! PRICELESS!

Bye Bye Hair Again!!!!! & Happy V-Day!

February 14, 2090

Happy V-Day! As u can see my girl love her cake!

Well ok I knew my hair would fall out... again.. but for some reason it's bothering me more this time. I pulled some clumps out this morning. Today is Day 3 of my 2nd Taxotere treatment. I guess I was getting used to that fine 1" of hair on my head. It was coming in so nice too, not curly or nappy and my original color.
Anywho... this treatment was a little different then 2 weeks ago. More fatique and I've been fealing a bit queezy, but nothing horrible. Oh and I don't have the steroid craze I had last time... SCHUCKS!!!!!! But still managed to bake a cake for V-day (what's up with me and baking these days?!?)

Home from treatment, and got my Gene Testing Results!

February 12, 2009

Treatment went well, uneventful. Home sipping tea and ready to go on the couch and watch some soaps.

My BRCA1 and BRCA2 gene testing results came back ....... NEGATIVE! See.... that bird shit did mean something after all! :-) Kuddos to my Chemogod's nurse Ellen, she really pushed the insurance company to get them to approve the test. Otherwise we would have waited a while to get it done cause it costs $3,000 (and it's just a blood test!)

Getting ready for treatment #2 (actually #6)

February 11, 2009

Going for more "stuff" tomorrow morning. And I finally slept thru the entire night last nite, first time in 2 whole weeks! And just in time to start my steroid craze tonight and for the next 5 days! Let's see what kind of projects I do this time.

Took a 1-2 mile walk lunch time today, first time since the summer, and man did that feel good!
(It's also 65 out today!)

Foob Update

February 10, 2009

Today is exactly 2 months since I had my surgery. And check me out... 2 words for ya'll... YEAH BABY!

Gene Testing

My insurance company finally approved my genetic testing for the BRCA1 and BRCA2 gene tests. It's the breast and ovarian cancer gene. Not sure what happens if I test positive, but it's a pretty important test. It'll be good to know for Isabelle when she gets older and also for other females in my family. I know if the ovarian is positive then I will have my ovaries removed. Should have the results in 2 weeks.

Ok... so I know you all think the prior post is pretty disgusting. BUT... considering that this test was approved on the same afternoon of the bird poo.....hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm:-)

Good luck sign?!?!?

February 5, 2009

Ok....I am probably one of the most supersticious people you know, if you didn't know that already. Ran an errand over at Walmart lunch time and this is what I came out to. YUP... and I took a picture of it! A seagull's poop the size of a friggin Big Mac! And no... I'm not cleaning it until it falls off, dissipates, or gets snowed on or rained on. Cause if I wipe it off... it's bad luck!

Hey it's the first sign of good luck I am have in a long time!

Ahhhh .....

February 4, 2009

..... the feeling of normalcy. Ok so 1 real bad day and 2 so-so days after my first treatment of Taxotere. Not that bad! Let's hope the next one is the same.

Last 2 days feeling like shit

February 3, 2009

Yeah I said it ... I feel like shit. No other words can describe it. Hopefully tomorrow is better.
And I did drag myself into work today!

The hardest part of this is taking care of a toddler when you have no energy to even take care of yourself; but being a parent doesn't stop cause of fuking cancer. No matter how horrible I feel and no matter how badly I just need to rest and lay down and close my eyes, there are times when I just can't. (Yes, as you can see I'm in a great mood:-)

I just never listen

February 2, 2009

Aka stubborness. Day 3 was a little tiring, day 4, yesterday Sunday, I felt so good that I did everything and anything I could possible think of doing... including baking!!!!! Yeah me.. baking.. can u imagine?!? My chemogod told me no matter how good I felt to "rest"... did I listen?... nope. Now I'm paying for it. Or at least that's what I think is going on. Every little thing exhausts me. Didn't even make it in to work this morning cause the minute I start to move my legs I am out of breath. Stomach is upset, kidneys hurt, back hurts.. the whole shibang. #1 problem is that I have been on steroids for 5 straight days, and they really give you a jolt and make you feel invincible, including not being able to sleep. My last day of sleep was LAST Tuesday! Even took 2 sleep aids last nite, and nada, no sleep. So needless to say today I am pretty much miserable. I will definitely take it easier next treatment on the 12th.

Ugg.

1 down 3 to go....

January 29, 2009

Or I really should say 5 down, 3 to go. Today's treatment was uneventful, Thank God! Got at doc's at 930, and we were home by 1:30.

I was so loaded up with sedatives and steroids and benedryl. Very sleepy when I got home, but I had to run around and watch Isabelle until 6:00 until Brian stopped working and he took her for out for a bit. She's got a cold so she's been big cranky, so that's always fun.

Friday Day #2

Slept for about 3 hours last nite, I guess I shouldn't complain it was something. Not cause of discomfort, yet, but the steroids just really pump you up. I tried to counteract it with a sedative but it didn't work that well. I'll be on the steroids until Sunday! Ugg. Guess this house will be spic n span clean by end the weekend! Anyone wanna come over for some midnight poker?!?!:-)

This morning not feeling too bad, but I have to remember to drink a ton of water and lay off the coffee... I had 2 cups this morning like an idiot and I'm starting to feel dehydrated. I just never learn! Going for my lovely Neulasta shot in an hour, have to take pain killers for this. How many drugs are in my body?!!??!? Cripes.

Will my hair go bye-bye, again?!??!!?

I hope not, but it's a good chance that it does.

Just wanted to show how fast it does grow back, this is 3 months exactly out of my last chemo treatment.